Star Light, Star Bright [Open]

[Deleted]

The fresh layer of snow crunched noisily beneath Amyntas’ large paws. It had been snowing heavily lately, covering most of the northern territories in a beautiful blanket of white. If it weren’t for the small patch of black fur on his rear, Amyn would have been all but invisible. Now if only the snow remained all year round. Being able to hide at any given moment would surely come in handy once the black and gold alpha of Descai discovered his hiding place. Sleep had been evading the arctic brute for far too long. Not only was he paranoid about the Descai alpha’s haunting words, he was also feeling a terrible guilt. He was part of the Airila pack now, yet he was lying to each and every one of his so-called pack members. To them, he was Zephyr, potential warrior. But the reality was that he was Amyntas, coward extraordinaire. He was lucky to have not screwed up the pack hunt. How he had managed to keep his focus was beyond him. But he could not rest fully with a guilty conscience. It was as if he had murdered Naomi and Zephyr all over again. He hadn’t slept for weeks after that massacre. And then there was Kallik... All of the blood on his paws... It was slowly eating away at his mind, slowly dragging him into insanity. He needed to find some reason to fight, some reason to live before it all became too much to bear. Death was the second to last thing on his mind. The true last was going insane. He would much rather be dead than insane. With a deep sigh, Amyn came to a standstill, casting his golden gaze to the sky. Just as snow had blanketed the earth, clouds blanketed the heavens, blocking any and all light from above. This saddened the arctic brute. He wanted to see stars, to contemplate his future among the gods. But with all the clouds... It was as if there was a massive wall between himself and the truth. And he wasn’t strong enough to tear it down. He was weak and vulnerable, and in desperate need of guidance. But where would he find that guidance if the heavens were closed off to him. Amyn stared for some time at the cloud barrier, as if his intense gaze would break a hole in the cover. Yet the dark sky remained so. He would find no revelation of his future tonight, and if the rest of the week played out in kind, he would find no revelation any time soon. All he wanted was someone he could talk to honestly. Someone who wouldn’t tear him a new one for lying through his teeth. Someone who could forgive him for being a monster. Someone who could save him from himself. words:: Four-Hundred and Seventy-Eight muse:: Rusty... tags:: Open ooc:: This post didn't go exactly as planned DX

[Deleted]

Of all the time she had been gone, been missing from this place she loved so much, she had certainly missed the the snow. She had gone so far south that the beautiful white stuff had disappeared from her life for a long while, which saddened her and even sickened her a little bit. She could handle the heat that came with spring and summer in the territory of Shiya, but she didn't like much more heat than that. Traveling south had actually caused her to be ill for some time, and at least she had recovered in time to face the wolves chasing her. She was glad to be rid of her family and of that heat, as horrible as it was. It had made her shed her beautiful, thick and ebony coat. In her time back, she had managed to grow it back and the extra weight was certainly welcome upon her shoulders. It felt nice to be home.

Spirit had her own plethora of problems in the world, but most of them seemed to have come to past. Her history with her family had never been one she was particularly proud of and she had hidden it from most people. Kastiel and Toiro were the only ones whom she'd ever told, and they had done their part in keeping it a secret. At this point, though, she was over it. It had gone and passed through her life as it should have. She didn't care anymore because it was over. She had killed her father and her mother was dead, and that pack would leave her and her beloved packmates alone. Her current issue to get through was losing Kastiel. She had adored the male, one of few in her life that had actually been so kind to her, and now he was gone. It pained her horribly, but that pain was slowly subsiding. Only a matter of time until she was able to move on.

Her feet shuffled through the snow quickly as she patrolled the borders, kicking up the white stuff as she went along. She'd been over the borders at least twice already and had nothing else in particular to do. Not that she even minded so much, as she loved this pack to do whatever it was she could for it. If patrolling over and over again to make sure no one slipped in past her defenses did it for their safety, then so be it. She loved the wolves within too much to risk anything. She was careful. Considering the mating season was about, she wouldn't be surprised if anyone ended up having pups come springtime. That was not anything she could risk either. If that happened, oh how her patrols would increase, how much she would be moving around to keep the younglings safe. She didn't know if anyone would be, though, as she certainly wouldn't. She would continue with her job.

Spirit had hardly seen the male as she trotted about. Indeed, with the fresh blanket of snow, he very well may have been that strange lizard she'd seen down south that blended and changed colors. She had little idea what the creature was called, but it had interested her. She halted in her patrolling and watched him for a moment. Zephyr... The name danced in her mind. She recognized him from the hunt, the new male that had joined their ranks but had politely declined the opportunity to become a warrior. She wondered why anyone his size and seeming capability would turn down something he could be great at. Perhaps she would ask; he seemed a little down anyways. Giving a jocund yip, she bounded over to him and greeted him with a nuzzle on the shoulder, hoping to not startle him. It was how she greeted every pack member. "Evening, Zephyr. How do you fare so late in the night? It's awfully chilly to be about." Though, she was one to talk...

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Deleted]

The dark sky relented no answers to the listless, earth-bound brute, not that he had asked a question to the unrelenting clouds. While not a big believer in a true higher power, Amyntas believed his thoughts could be heard as clearly as his words. He didn’t need to ask a question to have it be answered. Yet even knowing he would receive no answers, Amyn’s eyes remained locked on the slate-colored sky above him. Perhaps it was the angle of his head, tilted back as if he were about to howl, but a slightly relaxed feeling spread through his body, his brain going numb. How wonderful it would be, to simply remain as he was, relaxed and thoughtless, staring up at the sky forever. Some nights, he would see the moon and stars; others, nothing at all like tonight. But he wouldn’t care what he saw, for he would be a statue, frozen in time, completely harmless. Yes... That was certainly more desirable than the reality. If he were to never move from this spot again, to never shed another drop of innocent blood... Would that make up for all the blood he has shed? Would it make up for the lying? Would it heal his soul? With a heavy sigh, Amyntas lowered his head. Of course it wouldn’t. The past didn’t just go away, and all of the lives ended by his fang would haunt him for the rest of his life. Even if he were to perish, his death would not atone for the sins he had committed. His only solace now was to live each day as it was given to him, to protect those who could not protect themselves, and to never fall victim to the terrifying blackouts that surfaced during intense moments. It wasn’t as easy a task as it sounded, but the arctic brute was certain, with patience and a few deep breaths, he could pull through. He could do this. Upon hearing a cheery yip, Amyntas looked around. He never would have thought the others of the pack would have been awake at a time like this. Yet Spirit, one of the Arilia warriors, was there, bounding towards him. He offered a weak smile, and his tail swayed gently behind his back as she approached. But as she nuzzled his shoulder, the arctic brute tensed, startled by how willingly close the femme had gotten. Wh-What? Amyn’s mind froze as he stared at the dark femme, her question nearly falling on deaf ears. Why would she willingly get that close to him? His muscles ached to shy away from the affectionate female, yet he didn’t want to be rude and push her away so vehemently. Instead, he took a deep breath, letting it out just as deeply. “Spirit,” he murmured her name, somewhat scoldingly, yet with no pride in his voice. “You shouldn’t do that...” Before she could ask the inevitable Why, Amyn cleared his throat. “I find the weather to be perfect tonight.” His eyes darted back to the sky briefly, a mournful smile appearing on his maw. “Almost perfect.” In truth, Amyntas couldn’t even feel the cold bite in the air. His mass wasn’t all muscle and brawn. A good majority of it was fluffy winter fur. It added to his somewhat large size, and perhaps that was the reason everyone felt he would make a good warrior. But no. He was nothing but a soft, squishy lump of fur. “What brings you out so late, Spirit? Couldn’t sleep?” While he didn’t particularly care if he was the center of the conversation, he felt it only polite to ask a similar question in return, so long as he didn’t pry too much... words:: Six-Hundred and Thirty-Seven muse:: Meh... tags:: Spirit ooc::

[Deleted]

If she could freeze herself in one place forever, just out of the reach of others so they would sustain no harm from the choices she had made, then she would seize the opportunity in a split second. While nothing she ever did would have really hurt anyone, the people she had caused pain just by leaving, without even saying goodbye, had caused her heartache all the same. There was nothing she could do the change the fact that things had gone the way they had. She had her questions, some wouldn't be answered, but she didn't need them to be. They could float in limbo forever for all she cared. She had a pack, good friends whom she considered next to family. They made her life worth living.

Spirit had her heart broken time and time again when she had been farther north with the people she had once called family, by the male she had almost called a mate. She had long since moved on, though, and that was a good thing for her. She couldn't stand lingering upon anything for too long if it was going to cause her sorrow or some kind of grief. If it was going to impact her negatively for far longer than she could care for, then she found a quick and easy way to move past it so it wouldn't bother doing that to her. Nothing would ever fetter her to a horrible thing again, at least that was how she had planned it. Her current dilemma of moving on past Kastiel was difficult, but she was accepting that he wasn't going to come back, that he was gone forever for whatever reason in the world. It hurt, but that was reality.

The Tundra was glad to have any amount of company that night. She had yet to go visit Castien as she had planned on doing so many times, but often found herself occupied with other things. She wondered if she was just avoiding the meeting. She had heard the hardships he had gone through against the cougar and in protecting Toiro, all of which she was commending him for, the reason he deserved the position she once held. She spent many nights wide awake, knowing she needed to get her sleep and knowing there were others who did the patrolling this time of the night, which allowed her the rest, but she couldn't seem to ever sit still. It was an enigma to her that she had yet managed to solve. It would come with time. Seeing Zephyr in the snow made her believe he perhaps had some hardships managing sleep as well, which was common among some. She was, however, surprised by his first words.

Spirit moved away from him slightly, though still sat down as close as she could deem what might be comfortable to him. She didn't want to breach any boundaries, though it was her common greeting to the other wolves, some were different. Well, perhaps it would come easier with time, as it usually did. While every fiber sitting underneath her thick pelt wanted her to ask the dreaded question, she went with her better judgement, knowing full well that he had his reasons. If he wanted to share them, then he would. Even she had not shared her story with Toiro until her return weeks ago. "My apologies, I didn't intend to breach any boundaries." Her apology was sincere. She tended to like being on the good side of other wolves, rather than the bad. When it came down to it, she'd have to fight alongside them one day, but Zephyr seemed likeable. She nodded wisely at his words, flicking her golden eyes up towards the overcast sky. "Yes, I could use a little moon and stars myself, but perhaps we shall be luckier tomorrow."

The large female gave a shrug with her shoulders, arching her back a ways to stretch it out. Why was she out here again? Right, patrolling, lack of sleep. Something along those lines. "More or less, yes. Sleep doesn't come easy some nights. Besides, since my return, I've felt more obligated to keep the pack safe. I was quite worried while I was gone..." She really had been concerned over the well-being of the pack, though it had long been beyond her control. She glanced over at him. "I must say, you're quite a skilled hunter. It takes a lot of strength to bring down a moose, even as a pack. May I ask why you turned down a warrior position?" She didn't want to be nosy, but she did want to know if she could help calm any qualms he had about the position.

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Deleted]

It occurred to Amyntas that he may have hurt Spirit’s feelings with his cold behavior towards her. In fact, he would have been rather surprised if her feelings hadn’t been hurt. She was just trying to be friendly—in an intense way that was all her own, yet still friendly—and he denied her reciprocation outright. But what could he do? Nuzzle her back? Smile? His first instinct was to run away! Imagine how she would have felt had he done that! Yet there was no other alternative. He had to keep her at a distance. To keep them all at a distance. The more companions he made, the more of their blood would decorate the terra. And if it wasn’t by his own paw, it would definitely be by the Descai alpha’s. The pack would eventually come for him, seeking blood payment for his abandonment. And Amyn had little doubt they would kill any who got in their way. An icy chill seeped down the arctic brute’s spine. No. So long as he kept up his walls, kept up this façade, they wouldn’t succumb to the same fate as Kallik. As Naomi. He would protect them. The black and gold alpha would leave once his debt was paid. Wouldn’t he? Amyntas had little time to dwell on ‘what ifs’. The dark tundra femme took a few steps away from him, looking quite put out. Oh yes. He had hurt her feelings. Yet she still remained close to him, far closer than he would have expected after what he’d said to her. Perhaps she wasn’t as hurt as he thought? He eyed the femme warily. She was an interesting character, for certain. Or she just had tough skin. Either way, it brought a faint smile to the brute’s maw, however temporary. Even more surprising was the apology she uttered. “N-No, you don’t...” He sighed deeply, lowering his head in embarrassment. “I shouldn’t have been so harsh, Spirit. You just...surprised me.” He was a little flustered. Was that normal? Following Spirit’s example, Amyn sat back on his haunches. The snow beneath his rump was cold, and he wrapped his tail around his paws as he suppressed a shiver. Yet the chill was totally welcomed. He felt at home in the snow, and was pleased Anikira had a territory so close to his beloved Alaska. The arctic brute wished he had found the Airila pack before he’d stumbled into Acerbus. Things would have been far different. Spirit spoke up again, adding onto his comment about the weather. His own golden gaze flicked to the sky, following hers. “Tomorrow, you think? Perhaps I’ll have to wait to seek council until then...” he muttered, nearly trailing off at the end there. His eyes darted to Spirit’s face before fixing back on the sky. Tomorrow would be clear... Out of his periphery, Amyn saw Spirit shifting slightly. He watched her shoulder roll, her back arch, the muscle beneath the fur ripple with each movement. Before she could catch his gaze, however, he quickly averted it to the sky once again. At her admission to sleep being difficult, Amyn couldn’t hold back the wry, knowing smile. It seems I am not the only one with a heavy mind... That knowledge eased his worries, if only a little. He didn’t entirely understand what she meant by ‘return’, but he deduced the obvious fact that she had been away for some time. While it interested his as to why she was gone in the first place, he kept his curiosity under control. He wasn’t one to pry. That obviously didn’t apply to everyone, however. Not that Amyn could really blame Spirit for her curiosity. He had the makings of a warrior—it was visually obvious. Yet... He wasn’t sure how to answer her question. While he didn’t want to tell her the truth (because then he would feel obligated to tell her the whole truth), he also didn’t want to lie to her. He gave a dry smile, followed by a deep sigh, before gazing gently at her. “I’m pleased you would compliment me on my hunting capabilities, Spirit. It certainly boosts my ego just a bit.” A little dry humor. Cute. Amyn looked away from her again, his expression growing grim. “It isn’t...safe for me to be a warrior. Not for me. Not for the pack. Not for anyone.” He fixed his gaze on her once again, eyes smoldering. “Something was done to me in my past to make me a great threat in a tight situation.” words:: Seven-Hundred and Eighty-Nine muse:: Alright tags:: Spirit ooc:: He's kind of being a little honest. I'm surprised o.o

[Deleted]

Spirit had come to learn, over time, to not allow meager statements to throw her emotions of their hinges. Several times had her heart been broken because of that and it wasn't something she intended to experience again, even though there were possibilities. Although, it was something she avoided like a plague. Granted, his attitude towards her had thrown her slightly off-guard, but she could only assume she understood why. Outgoing as she was, she tended to be a little too up close and personal for some members of the pack. Most had seemed to adjust to it over time, accepting her odd advances. She loved the members of this pack dearly, each and every one of them. If they needed the time to adjust to her, she would give it to them and not complain. It did make her happy, though, when she received a nuzzle or something of the sort in return.

If she had known of his situation, there would have been points in which she could say she understood. Upon leaving the area, she had felt she needed to keep her pack out of it, because the very last thing she wanted was for their blood to be shed at her own fault. She had led her old family away from the lands and had taken care of it there, though she had little intention of returning, having the feeling they would have killed her for sure. But, she had survived and persevered, so she had returned. Immediately, she had realized the mistake she had made in going off on her own. There was nothing stronger than her love for the wolves in this land, and the same went the other way around. They would have fought tooth and claw to their last breath to help her with her qualm, and she had known that, but had chosen to ignore it. At least she had promised Toiro no more surprises in that sense. No more leaving.

The tundra femme often found her heart hollow, broken in places she wished she could fix. While she clung to things of the past, she was slowly getting over them, and that meant keeping her head held high with a grin on her maw. She treated everyone the same, loved them with all her heart and offered to be there for anything they needed. When she did this, others may have said it helped them, but, in reality, it fixed her. With every day that passed, the hole filled up little by little and she felt healthier as a whole. It was a good feeling, one she wasn't intent on losing. Her eyebrows arched high with her smile, a small laugh escaping her throat. "Come now, Zephyr, don't be silly." She wasn't offended by his words or his attitude, albeit slightly surprised at them. "Not everyone likes me. Well, at least at first. I have this uncanny ability of catching people off-guard." There were still people out there, probably, that hated her guts and wanted her burned and thrown into the sea.

Part of her wished and dreamed she had been born into this pack, then she would have been capable of avoiding the pain she had gone through. The snow was a part of her home, but so was the forest and the mild summers that came with it. She could say with complete ease that this was a huge upturn in her life, one of the good aspects that had come out of the bad. It was not the hand she had been dealt, but she was happy with her life as it was now and she didn't want to change it, otherwise she would be someone else entirely. She gave a small nod, "I will be out and about making my rounds all the same. Perhaps the moon will give me a little more direction; so I don't run into a tree again..." She had done so on the way over, the light completely obscured in the darkness of the forest. She hadn't sensed it until she'd collided headfirst with its trunk. "Of course, you are more than welcome to join me on those rounds." The invitation was intended as something friendly. She did try being everyone's friend.

Spirit had not seen the gaze he had cast at her, not that she would've minded so much. Her jaws gaped widely in a yawn, though not one necessarily of exhaustion. It wasn't one that signified she wanted sleep, though she needed it, and it was more or less just there. Sleep had been difficult in the last year about, tortured with nightmares and with things she needed to protect. She remembered the time Toiro and Kastiel needed to leave to make alliances, and in the process, the pack members disappeared one by one. She had been in a horridly disheveled state, lack of sleep and time taking its toll. It had been difficult to keep up the borders by herself, and imagine her relief when her leaders returned. Although, sleep had seemed to escape her quite a bit since.

The femme sensed his hesitation and was about to retracted her statement, but he started speaking and she closed her maw the short distance it had been opened. She couldn't help the chuckle that slipped out of her maw at his humor. Dry or not, at least he was attempting it, and she appreciated it nonetheless. Her gaze softened as he continued, pondering over what could have made him feel like such a danger to the pack. "We all need a boost in ego. There's nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself." She gave herself a mental preparation every single day, and it tended to keep her in her upbeat mood. She could only nod for a moment, thinking deeply before giving him an answer. "I was once a princess intended to create good offspring for a male that held no interest in me, but now look where I am. We've all had our fair share of painful times, yes, but..." She paused, being sure to hold his gaze, "it's okay to move on. If it helps, you can confide in me with things like this, and even use me as a sparring partner if it would make you feel better." Her tone was gentle, soft, something it often wasn't. She was close to several wolves in the territory and she did really try to be. "I am your friend, Zephyr. Let me help?"

[/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Deleted]

Amyntas was always far too conscious of the feelings of others. Rarely did he put himself first. He had known how strongly Naomi felt for Zephyr, and he had let them be, despite the fact that he had his own desires for the beautiful femme. He had allowed Kallik to drag him into Descai, despite his preference to never be part of a pack again. And he allowed Aludra to do the very same. The latter being the far worse of his crimes, as his existence in the pack was a potential threat should the Descai alpha come searching for him. So despite Spirit’s laughter, and her claim that his harshness was acceptable, Amyn felt as if she were hiding how she was really feeling. Perhaps she was trying to cheer him up by saying she wasn’t always likeable. Amyn managed a weak smile for her. “I bet...” he murmured. She seemed like the type that required some getting used to. In fact, she reminded the arctic brute much of Angel, though he didn’t have many encounters with the Tundra femme. Spirit seemed to at least have a head on her shoulders, though. The few times he spoke with Angel, Amyn was under the impression that she was a bit of an airhead. As the conversation flicked back to the moon, Amyn’s eyes shot upward again. Speaking with Spirit like this, however curt his responses were, was having a soothing effect on him. While he still wished to look up at the starry sky, he felt as if he no longer needed to seek counsel. At least, not nearly as dire as he had wished tonight. His guilt conscience would wreak havoc on his soul in due time, and he would find himself wandering about late at night once more. When Spirit mentioned running into a tree, Amyn couldn’t hide his laughter in time. It was a genuine laugh, and it felt a little strange in his throat. Like he was slowly returning to the wolf he was prior to meeting Kallik. “Yes. Trees are not kind. They do not get out of your way, no matter how nicely you ask.” He wasn’t prone to running into trees often, but he’d had his fair share of embarrassing moments, sprawled on the ground in a daze beneath a massive oak. Those were days he was so lost in thought that reality was only at the fringes of his consciousness. At the femme’s invitation, Amyn gave her a startled look. She wanted him to accompany her on rounds? That didn’t seem too difficult... “I... I would like that.” While it pained him greatly to think of letting another in as he had before, Amyn knew that he couldn’t remain alone forever. He was not a solitary beast, despite his several attempts to try and be so. Companionship was something he sought after greatly, and though he would have preferred a male companion, Spirit seemed capable of handling herself. If something were to happen and her life be in danger, he was fairly certain the pack would spring to her rescue. Airila wasn’t like Descai. They were a family, the kind his had been back in Alaska. It was heartwarming, knowing that with all the evil he had seen on Anikira, that there was at least a small glimmer of hope. He only wished he could keep that glimmer from getting snuffed out. Amyntas was grateful to Spirit’s chuckling at his humor. It was awful, really, his attempts. He had never been a very clever wolf in those respects, and even if she was merely being polite, it made Amyn smile warmly at her. That smile slipped quickly, however, as the femme began to tell her tale to him. His eyes widened, and he half-expected her to go into more detail than she did. Even with that small amount of information, Amyn felt a strong amount of sympathy towards her. As her eyes bore into his, he tried his hardest to break the connection, but there was something powerful about her gaze. He flinched when she told him it was okay to move on, and he quickly rose to his feet, casting his eyes to the side. “If it were that easy, I wouldn’t be where I am today.” He took a few steps away from Spirit, his eyes still locked on the ground. “I was... I was tortured by humans, Spirit.” The weight that lifted from his shoulders was so great that the brute let out a deep sigh. He had never told anyone about that. Naomi and Zephyr had been in the same predicament, and they’d never spoken about it for fear of the past recurring. Amyn simply believed he was dangerous, and by admitting to what happened, it would only make that danger more prominent. But... Was Spirit right? Would it help to confide in someone, at least a little bit? His eyes shot to meet Spirit’s, apprehension swirling in the pale orbs. “They turned me into a killing machine.” He waited for it. For the panic, the terror, to settle into her eyes. He waited for her to bolt, to run to the alpha to have him run out. words:: Eight-Hundred and Eighty-Six muse:: Better tags:: @spirit ooc:: Sorry it took so long to reply DX

[Deleted]

tell my mother, tell
my father i've done the best i can to make them realize this is my life

SPIRIT

Once upon a time, the female had been very aware of feelings, but only her own. She had come a long way since that time, but she supposed having her heart broken would do that sort of thing. She had immediately become conscious of how everyone else felt, about how everyone else seemed to react to anything and everything. A fog had lifted and every little detail about the things around her had become ultimately clear. The intentions of others, especially those of her own father. She would not stand for it then and even hadn't in the end. She was glad she had left, come here, come to a place where they actually cared about her well-being. This was home.

Spirit didn't so much mind the brashness the brute was showing. It was okay for her, because she cared to understand enough that he was not quite comfortable in this setting. She had seen this even in the beginning, when they had all met him at the pack hunt. It almost seemed like he didn't want to be dragged into a group setting, yet had allowed such to happen anyways. it was an interesting bit to her mind. She understood that there were people who didn't like her. That was understandable because it wasn't the first time any of it had happened. She had plenty of wolves who did not like her. As kind and happy as she always tried to be whenever her pack mates surrounded her, viciousness laid underneath, waiting to be released at something that dared to threaten the lives of those she loved. If anyone came after her pack mates, her friends, she would not hesitate in telling them, "Over my dead body." She had a few times and those people had failed miserably. That was enough reason for them to dislike her at the least.

her ears twitched at the sound of his laughter, a smile blooming on her face when she seemed to manage to get him to feel anything that wasn't depressing at all. The laughter was a good thing to her and if she could make anyone do it, she felt she had accomplished a goal. She didn't expect everyone to like her or everyone to laugh at her jokes. She just wanted them to see she was there for them if they needed her to be. She would die for them, even if they hated her guts from the inside out. They were her packmates. They were her family. And there was nothing more noble than to die for them. "Yes, I noticed that they seem to be rooted in place every time you try to start a conversation with them." Her jokes were not all that great either, but that was okay. She seemed to furrow her brow at the surprised expression on his face. She wanted company now and then, too. "Good, I'm glad. My rounds tend to be a tad lonely now and then. Patrolling only gets interesting when there's a bear or a mountain lion involved." A pain shot through her shoulder, causing her coat to twitch noticeably, when she mentioned the bear. She remembered being attacked by one, with Kastiel. That almost had not ended well.

Spirit loved company. She adored it. She didn't really know what she would do with herself if she were to attempt to live a solitary life. It had been horribly difficult when she had led her family away from here, tempted to throw herself off a cliff a few times. She loved these wolves more than anything in the world. Nothing could change that. From them, she had horrid separation anxiety. She was like a mother without her pups or a pup without her mother. She sought them, because they made her feel safe and welcome and happy and like she belonged. That was something none of them ever failed at.

His jokes were better than nothing. Like the laughter, if she managed to get something out of him, she saw it as a step in the right direction, a goal that was getting closer and closer to being reached. Even as she explained her story, her sharp golden gaze never once strayed from his. She never intended it to be that way, to break such a connection. She held it there, refusing to let it budge. She was not ashamed of what happened, not anymore, because it had lead to something so much better. When he did break it, struck by her own words, and locked them quickly on the ground, she became concerned. Every hair seemed to want to stand on end when he told her that one sentence. Tortured. She had never enjoyed that word and saw no reason at all for it. She had heard of humans, but had never met them. She had come from far north of here, where humans did not live. Her heart broke. Again, her heart broke, but for a different reason.

A killing machine? And what exactly was he waiting for? For her to run away? There was so little that she was afraid of when it came to the physical aspect of things. Heartbreak was what she was scared of, terrified of being rejected outright by someone she cared about for a while. Losing her family. There was such a small amount of things in her list of fears that it was rather ridiculous. That's probably what made her a good warrior, though, that she ran into dangerous things with every intent to protect her loved ones without daring to think about it. She blinked slowly, processed the information. Her golden gaze held his steadily, nothing but external calm. Inside, there was a small amount of turmoil. "...Well, that's something we can work on then." He was clearly torn about it. She was worried what would happen if he were to lose it, per say, but she trusted him not to. They were pack mates after all. Her light joking seemed to return, despite the nearly serious expression on her face. "You're part of a pack now, Zephyr. You can't get rid of me that easily."


"spirit speaking" - #F4F4F4
"spirit thinking"
"others speaking"
END HERE

WORD COUNT: 000 | TAGGED: name
NOTES: words

i'm not angry, i'm just saying
that sometimes goodbye is a second chance