[ rasalas ] how time flies

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How long had she spent near this creek? She had practically made this area her den since she had returned from...running away. Though time had passed long since then, the regret for running away still nestled tightly in her chest, causing occasional pangs of pain or sorrow. She berated herself nearly every day for daring to think that it would have been okay for her to run away, but that was always her reaction whenever fear overtook her body. She was not a fighter, and had always had a hard time defending herself over any little thing. When she was scared, she ran away, and that was her immediate reaction.

Yet she felt terrible about doing it. Rasalas didn't deserve that from her, but she didn't know how to feel or think! She had been pregnant, carrying his puppies, and that had sent her mind reeling. The only other authoritative figure in her life had been abusive towards her, for being the runt of the litter, and she had developed a fear of alphas and such in general. Spending time around Rasalas had changed that. She had been so comfortable around him, albeit her usual awkward self at times, but he was always so kind to her. The expression on his face when she had returned...it had broken her heart. How could she have done that to him?

It didn't seem to matter anymore. The time had come not long after her return for the pups to be born, and she remembered the physical pain it had brought her, the tears it had brought to her eyes. Those tears had been a mix of pain and the joy at seeing her children for the first time. Her heart had swelled so much with pride and happiness that it constantly threatened to burst from her chest and spill its contents on the ground each time she looked at them. Four healthy, beautiful puppies, who were now six months old.

Antares, Tacio, Avalon, and Mira... Beautiful names, beautiful wolves; still young, but incredibly bright and wonderful. She loved each of them, cared for them, and maybe coddled them a little too much, but she couldn't help it. It was her first time being a mother and she hadn't had much to rely on other than her instincts, and memories of things that her mother had done. Aowyn knew she coddled her pups too much, and even still she coddled them. She didn't want any of them to get hurt, wanted to protect them from everything that was bad, but...she supposed she couldn't really do that. They would grow older eventually, have their own families.

The russet femme shook such thoughts from her head, not quite ready to think about her own pups having pups. They were still young and little so she could coddle them as long as she liked!

Aowyn turned her gaze back onto the water, yellow-grey orbs drifting along the shimmering surface carefully, looking quietly for the silver flash that represented the fish. With having had her pups already, she had been slowly turning back into hunting, which had helped to shed off the fat she had gained while the pups were in her stomach. Now, only a small amount of stretched skin hung around her belly, as though she had never been pregnant in the first place. She almost missed the feeling, but reveled that her pups still cuddled with her every night when they slept.

With a swift movement her jaws parted and her body jerked, splashing the water about as she almost scrambled to catch the fish that attempted to dart by. She lifted her head in a victorious manner, holding the fish tightly between her jaws and pulling herself out of the creek, mostly soaked from her splashing about. Her hunting skills were still there, just unused, and were coming back to her quickly. She dropped the little silver creature into the small pile that had accumulated in the roots of a nearby tree. There seemed to be enough for the pups, and herself, and one other.

Her mind instantly went to Rasalas, yet she hesitated. She cared very deeply for the male, but she was almost afraid to admit that and was hesitant to bother him. He was the alpha, and was likely doing something of importance. She didn't want to interrupt anything important he could be doing. Then again, she had always been something of an omega, whether her rank was directly defined as that or not, so what did she even know about running a pack? Dropping some damp moss on the fish to keep the heat from rotting them, she stepped back and mused over her thoughts for a moment.

Aowyn made up her mind, tilting her head back and releasing the call before she could change her mind, calling for him. She made it rather quick and fell silent, deciding to turn and lay at the edge of the stream to see if he came. Part of her was afraid he would not, but she wanted his company, wanted to see him and talk to him, over anything, over whatever. It didn't matter to her, so long as he was there.

"Talking."
Thinking.

words: 874 | tagged: @rasalas | notes: have a thread

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Muscles rippled beneath the russet pelt of the Alpha while he performed his watch. Border patrol had always been something important to the brute, as the last thing he wanted was for those of Tassos to feel threatened. They had survived the horrifying eruption and he was not willing to let them fall to anything - especially not now that the pups were born. They were not so little and clumsy as before, but that did not make them capable of defending themselves. His concerns did not just extend out to them either, but to the rest of his family within The Occasus and Xisyn. They had turned him from being a self-destructive, loner into something almost worthwhile. At least, Rasalas was attempting to believe himself to be good in some form. Despite the odds being ever against him, the male needed to have confidence in himself; without such, he left all of them susceptible to attack. Thus, with a stern expression and focused eyes, the male found himself marking and searching the terrain.

Besides defending the lands, the male utilized this time quite wisely. It was a vital opportunity to settle the noise within his skull. Time had not been particularly kind to this canine and often he found it difficult to process that this in reality was his new life. Before Tassos came into existence, prior to Ryala even being considered, the brute had been a loner; he simply wandered the lands searching for two canines that he still had not found; however, there was even a life that existed before that. Rasalas had a family, one that he was responsible for guiding, protecting. Two younger sisters had stared wide-eyed at him, eager to learn all that he could possibly teach them; but, those days were gone. The Alpha had failed that family and now they resided only within his mind. Maybe that was the safest place for them. A transition had occurred somewhere along the line, though, somewhere that could not precisely be identified. Regardless, it had brought him to be an Alpha of a true pack - not just a small family group - and a father. Leadership that he had unknowingly possessed was forced to reveal it's naive face when Rasalas needed to step up to the plate of his rank.

Rasalas had learned the basics of being an Alpha, at least he liked to believe so, but as for a father - that was still new for him. Taking care of siblings and offspring were very different. Now, the brute needed to work together with Aowyn to provide consistency in the upbringing of their children. Often it proved to be a mental struggle for him, not that Aowyn's views differed excessively from his own, but in being around the red femme. When the brute had been at one of his lowest places, he had fallen for this newly accepted femme. There was something around her that simply lured him in and failed to ever release, she was intoxicating in the best way. Even so, she had run off in fear of him; something that, despite all rationalizing, still stung. It pained his wounded heart to know that she believed herself unsafe here, so much that she would rather flee the safety of Tassos' borders. Still, Aowyn had received forgiveness and the brute attempted to keep his mouth shut on the topic. He wished not to dangle such a thing over her head, every creature made mistakes; the heavens knew that he certainly had made more than a few.

It was then that an abrupt song snatched away the reflective Alpha's attention. Instantly the brain recognized the beautiful sound and brought a smile to the canine's muzzle. 'Aowyn,' even hearing her name within his brain triggered happiness to grow. It was an unconscious and unwilling reaction for the russet male; yet, one that he had no desire to change. Even if nothing ever came from their relations other than their offspring, she was still their mother; that alone would always give her his complete protection, respect, and a piece of his heart that no other could receive. The song was made direct for his presence, a special request from her to him. Instantly the brute turned and set his pace at an urgent run; although no panic was evident in her song, he still longed to see her immediately. Sometimes Rasalas wondered if others witnessed his willingness to do anything for the russet femme, if they had realized that she was his underlying weakness.

Electric excitement bolted throughout his spinal column, sending impulses of ecstasy throughout his muscular frame. Aowyn would soon be within his presence again, although it had not been long since he had seen her - now it would be just the two of them. Their time together had been commonly spent with the pups or other pack members, rarely were they ever truly alone. Perhaps even today they would not be, but the Alpha was hopeful as her lone silhouette formed on the horizon. Gradually he decreased in speed, not wanting the huntress to believe that he was too excited to come and see her; mostly for fear of seeming foolish. Regardless, the drumming of his heart was proof that he cared deeply for this female, even if she saw him as nothing more than her Alpha.

"Good day, Lady Aowyn," the brute's words flowed smoothly from his muzzle, politely, genuinely. Golden optics swam across the scene before him, taking in the way Aowyn's pelt rippled in the slight winds; they proceeded to scan the area, ensuring that the two of them were safe here. There was no reason for him to doubt the security of Tassos; yet, the Alpha could not help but want this femme in particular to be safe in totality. He settled to rest his eyes upon hers, loving the vibrance within them. "I do believe you sang for me?" his question was slightly playful and inquiring all at the same time. Surely she had not interrupted anything, but that did not mean that she did not have her reasons for summoning him. Mentally he noted the small pile of fish that the female was gathering, longing to bring them another meal later that day. It was useless to try and convince the huntress that he would bring the pups and herself food every day, she was going to continue performing her pack and motherly duties either way. Secretly, her devotion to Tassos impressed the brute as did most things about her.

Today, she had brought the glimpses of a genuine smile to his face.