Post by Liadan on Feb 15, 2016 2:20:41 GMT -5
The Agoge weighed heavily on the adolescent wolf’s mind these days, knowing that it would not be long before she left the relative comfort and safety of her home, Ina’mos, and made the journey across the sea to Vor’asa. After surviving ten moon cycles thus far, Liadan was close to her first birthday, and yet she still felt, in some way, pup-like. She’d grown certainly, though there was always room to grow a little more, and she’d lost a lot of her puppyish naivety, but she felt as though she had so much more to learn. She was restless. At night, she tossed and turned in the dens, desperately chasing sleep that rarely came. She felt strongly that there was something more she needed to go to become an adult, and that she would not know it unless she completed the Agoge with her brothers.
But if anything made her feel like an adult, it was the arrival of her younger half-siblings. Although she did not spend much time in their presence if it could be helped, she was endlessly fascinated by how small they were. It was hard to believe that she had once been so tiny, so helpless, and yet it seemed so recent that she and her brothers took their first steps outside of the dens. She remembered vividly how her father warned her of the alligators at the swamp, his huge form imitating one walking toward her. A warm smile spread across her face at the memory. At the time she had no realised how ridiculous he’d looked, it was only in retrospect she realised how low he’d been willing to stoop to amuse her.
But the smile faded when she came back to herself in the present. Liadan was angry at her father for taking another female besides her mother, and for allowing her to die. She had begrudgingly accepted that her father had more than one mate, but she frequently refused to acknowledge Odara’s existence, who she despised in spite of not having met her yet. That would certainly be an interesting meeting, Liadan thought, given that she would probably want to tear her limb from limb. In truth, the anger was just misdirected anger at her father again. She loved her father truly, and she still wanted to make him proud, but how could she do so when his own actions were so…Pride-less? At first she did not believe the story he’d told her when she’d asked about Cimeries and Balthazar – in whom she had placed some misdirected resentment. It sounded so different from the Sabaoth she knew, the one who’d raised her and romped in the snow with her with endless patience. This monster who took a female against her will, and then allowed her to die once she’d given birth to his pups… It was unthinkable.
She supposed she should get used to it, to save her further heartbreak. The world seemed to change around her as she sped rapidly toward adulthood, the metaphorical wool being ripped away from her eyes. The world wasn’t fair. The world would not treat the weak or faint-hearted kindly out of some illusion of equality. Liadan felt her heart harden, her brow set firmly in place. Her father was not perfect, and the sooner she realised that, the sooner she would be able to earn her place in the world.
On this particular morning, Liadan’s introspection took place on the way to the swamp. She had still not visited it, and it felt like the last thing she needed to conquer before she left for the Agoge – a rite of passage as such. Her dark paws carried her swiftly to the murky marshland, moving as fast as her thoughts did. There was another thing – or rather, another wolf– she felt she could not leave without saying goodbye to, and yet she was the very same wolf that Liadan had been avoiding. It was someone whom Liadan felt would not appreciate her participation in the Agoge, someone she worried would try and talk her out of it. If she forbade Liadan from leaving, she knew she would leave anyway, and she knew it would only cause a rift between them. If she left without saying anything, there was nothing to be angry at, no wrong-doing or actions taken against her will.
As if her thoughts alone had caused her to manifest out of thin air, the unmistakable figure of her mother appeared amongst the trees. For a long moment, Liadan considered turning around, heading straight for the coastline, and disappearing into the sea. And yet… And yet, she knew she could not face the guilt of leaving her mother without so much as a goodbye. It seemed like as much of a necessity to do this, to speak with her mother one last time, before she began her journey into adulthood. Perhaps this way, Liadan could make her mother see reason. Perhaps her mother would not even object to her leaving.
Drawing a deep breath to gather her courage, Liadan called out, “Mother!” and trotted toward her with and air of confidence she did not truly feel.
Word count: 861
Notes: When did Lia get so contemplative xD
Tags: Roka
But if anything made her feel like an adult, it was the arrival of her younger half-siblings. Although she did not spend much time in their presence if it could be helped, she was endlessly fascinated by how small they were. It was hard to believe that she had once been so tiny, so helpless, and yet it seemed so recent that she and her brothers took their first steps outside of the dens. She remembered vividly how her father warned her of the alligators at the swamp, his huge form imitating one walking toward her. A warm smile spread across her face at the memory. At the time she had no realised how ridiculous he’d looked, it was only in retrospect she realised how low he’d been willing to stoop to amuse her.
But the smile faded when she came back to herself in the present. Liadan was angry at her father for taking another female besides her mother, and for allowing her to die. She had begrudgingly accepted that her father had more than one mate, but she frequently refused to acknowledge Odara’s existence, who she despised in spite of not having met her yet. That would certainly be an interesting meeting, Liadan thought, given that she would probably want to tear her limb from limb. In truth, the anger was just misdirected anger at her father again. She loved her father truly, and she still wanted to make him proud, but how could she do so when his own actions were so…Pride-less? At first she did not believe the story he’d told her when she’d asked about Cimeries and Balthazar – in whom she had placed some misdirected resentment. It sounded so different from the Sabaoth she knew, the one who’d raised her and romped in the snow with her with endless patience. This monster who took a female against her will, and then allowed her to die once she’d given birth to his pups… It was unthinkable.
She supposed she should get used to it, to save her further heartbreak. The world seemed to change around her as she sped rapidly toward adulthood, the metaphorical wool being ripped away from her eyes. The world wasn’t fair. The world would not treat the weak or faint-hearted kindly out of some illusion of equality. Liadan felt her heart harden, her brow set firmly in place. Her father was not perfect, and the sooner she realised that, the sooner she would be able to earn her place in the world.
On this particular morning, Liadan’s introspection took place on the way to the swamp. She had still not visited it, and it felt like the last thing she needed to conquer before she left for the Agoge – a rite of passage as such. Her dark paws carried her swiftly to the murky marshland, moving as fast as her thoughts did. There was another thing – or rather, another wolf– she felt she could not leave without saying goodbye to, and yet she was the very same wolf that Liadan had been avoiding. It was someone whom Liadan felt would not appreciate her participation in the Agoge, someone she worried would try and talk her out of it. If she forbade Liadan from leaving, she knew she would leave anyway, and she knew it would only cause a rift between them. If she left without saying anything, there was nothing to be angry at, no wrong-doing or actions taken against her will.
As if her thoughts alone had caused her to manifest out of thin air, the unmistakable figure of her mother appeared amongst the trees. For a long moment, Liadan considered turning around, heading straight for the coastline, and disappearing into the sea. And yet… And yet, she knew she could not face the guilt of leaving her mother without so much as a goodbye. It seemed like as much of a necessity to do this, to speak with her mother one last time, before she began her journey into adulthood. Perhaps this way, Liadan could make her mother see reason. Perhaps her mother would not even object to her leaving.
Drawing a deep breath to gather her courage, Liadan called out, “Mother!” and trotted toward her with and air of confidence she did not truly feel.
Word count: 861
Notes: When did Lia get so contemplative xD
Tags: Roka
