Changing Winds [Open!]

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A very light, warm wind rippled through the grasses of the plains, stirring them ever so slightly like a maritime breeze on a calm ocean. Kesle lifted her muzzle and closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of the autumn sun and the breeze ruffling her smoky-coloured fur. The nice weather helped distract her from her current predicament.

Winter was coming.

Kesle had seen quite a lot of winter- as a pup, she had grown up in the north, in Taiyir. The winters there were feirce and aften long. Yes, Kesle had gotten to know winter quite well, and could survive. But that had been when she had a pack. Being a lone wolf was different. One had to survive on their own. One misstep, one bad hunt, and it could mean a slow, painful death by starvation in some snowbank. As if answering her thoughts, the reccently healed wound on her flank gave a small twinge. A farewell gift from an elk that did not want to lay down and die, it had healed well, but was a little stiff. Kesle had been reduced to hunting small game the past few weeks. Not that it mattered- rabbits and rodents were enough to sustain a single lanky she-wolf.

Back to the problem at hand.

Kesle had been looking more and more toward pack borders as winter approached. She knew that she would have a much better chance in a pack, and that they would be more eager to accept outsiders if it meant an extra paw to hunt during hungry months. But a part of her- a large part- rebelled at the idea of joining a group. Kesle liked the solitude of a loner, and having time to think without other wolves in her face every minute. And it wasn't as if she was a champion at communicating anyways. The she-wolf had a tendency to get lost in though mid-scentence, and that and her overall dreamy quietness combined made her seem unsociable. She remembered often enough her brother would get mad at her  for spacing out and forgetting he was there. But Kesle dreaded a hard winter alone as much as she  dreaded having to bow to the social ties of a pack.

She stared into the horizon, deep in thought.
How do I choose?


OOC: First post! XD 
Muse: Pretty good.

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The plains were a beautiful place, but seemed so empty. Flat plains spread out far as the eye could see, and around this time, it wasn't nearly as green as it should be. Winter was coming fast, the grass slowly draining of any color. Though it was still living, its time was coming soon and Zira could feel the sorrow it brought- but also the joy for the rebirth. Like a phoenix, it would be born of its own death. It was a heartbreaking beauty, truly. Life seemed to be this way as well; the bitterness brought happiness. A paradox, but also a law.

Zira wandered aimlessly, no real purpose nor destination on her mind. She simply knew now, she could enjoy this moment. She had just been accepted into Ultoris as the shaman- the shaman. It still seemed unreal, yet Zira had vowed to her alpha never would she fail any of them. She wouldn't allow it to happen, not after her entire pack had been wiped out of illness. Never again would she lose someone like that, anyone. Zira's eyebrows furrowed at the thought, and she shook it physically from her mind. She took a deep breath, and allowed the joy to be present again in her. It was visible now, tangible because of her.

Zira's eyes had fallen on a figure relatively far from her, an ashen wolf. She was gazing into the horizon, the sun almost dimming the day, almost touching the end of the earth. Zira smiled and began to trot towards this she wolf, her natural friendliness making her unable to do anything else. When she approached, she went about 4 feet to her left and sat down, her eyes the same way as this stranger's. The sight really convinced Zira that there was a greater being, and she prayer and thanked that power everyday silently.

It's beautiful- breathtaking, isn't it? Zira cooed, her voice soft yet holding the newfound power of belonging somewhere. Her eyes, bright and vibrant and emerald, held that strange humble pride. She didn't make eye contact quite yet with this she wolf, for it was in Zira's nature to allow the other to decide whether they wanted to share company.

- - -

ooc; lesseeeeeee

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"It's beautiful- breathtaking, isn't it?"

Kesle spun around, surprise forming her jaws into a small o. Her eyes fell on a light fawn coat. Deep, startlingly green eyes were tilted slightly downcast, not meeting her own pale-yellow stare. The way this wolf held herself spoke of quiet, gentle friendliness. She was of light build, and had an air of joy for life in general, but something about the way she held herself also spoke of determination. Kesle suddenly had an absurd desire to pour out her thoughts to this stranger, to get it all off her chest.

Even as the thought crossed her mind, the smoky she-wolf realized that not only had she completely missed the wolf's approach, she had also been sitting there for several minutes staring.

Kesle quickly turned all the way around to face her new aquaintance, lowering her tail and ears slightly and dipping her head, hoping she didn't look threatening. It had been so long since she had met another soul, she had almost completely forgotten the postures needed for not having furious wolves at your throat, insulted at accidental dominance displays.

"Er, yes," Kesle stammered. "It is."

And it was, indeed. The setting sun laid the plains awash in fiery shades of gold and amber, while also painting the sky and clouds in brilliant shades of crimson, purple, and pale pinks and oranges. The light breeze Kesle had been enjoying earlier had picked up slightly, brushing the waves of grasses into thick crests. Kesle was a little irritated, but not surprised, to realize that some time had passed while she had been idly staring into the distance, lost in her own world.

Speaking of which, it might be a good idea to pay attention to the situation at hand.

Kesle focused back on the stranger wolfess in time to hear her response.

OOC: Yay! Posting! ^^
Muse: Not too great, sorry.

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Zira looked to the shewolf she had just startled, as the ashen femme faced her completely. Zira still sat down, and her emerald eyes met a drained yellow and green. Zira could see something in those eyes; the same shyness that once defined herself. The timidness. Zira smiled warmly, softly, not trying to come off in a way where she had dominance. She just sat there, fearless but also wary, and genuine. Zira's head tilted a little when she spoke, a small gesture of friendliness she often portrayed. I'm sorry if I startled you- Zira spoke softly again. She could tell this wolf wasn't familiar with gentle souls like herself. It both brought Zira heartache, and joy because Zira could show her the old wolfs true instinct of community.

The sky near the horizon was lit by a beautiful, yet soft inferno. Orange and red defined it's linings, yet there was that subtle pink. Zira decided if the heart was a visible things, that is what hers would look like; passionate yet gentle, wary and also compassionate and kind. Zira used to be haunted by her dark past, of losing everything she had ever known... But that flame was lit again by this new family and new position, new duty. New life.

She had undergone this heartbreaking metamorphosis, and came out on top as someone worth something. It was such a beautiful experience. I'm sorry, again. If you prefer solitude, please just tell me. I will gladly leave you be, Zira began, her words strong but also submissive right now. She didn't want to make this wolf uncomfortable in any way, and could tell she could possible be in that position right now. Zira stood up from her previous sitting posture, and made eye contact with the femme before her, waiting for her judgement. Now standing, she took a step back to show she would leave if that was truly what this wolf wanted. 

You would think she would appear offended, or even angry but Zira's face was so soft. Innocent, but also haunted. More so, though, it still held a joy that would never leave her for she held so tightly. She was proud of who she was, and her kindness was visible in every aspect of her beautiful form. Bright green eyes flickered with that passion for others, but still, she waited

- - -

ooc; c: bb<3

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"I'm sorry again. If you prefer solitude, please just tell me. I will gladly leave you be."

"No, wait! It's fine!" Kesle blurted before thinking. She hadn't realized before talking to someone, just idle chatter, sharing a conversation, how much she had missed it. The wolfess' words came to her mind. Prefer solitude? Perhaps... But maybe what she really preferred was freedom. She hadn't liked the confinement of her pack, the way that her father and especially brother had always shadowed her, as if afraid she would dissapear like her mother and sister. She had itched to be the master of herself, to be able to do as she liked without worrying people, and have time to her own thoughts, to maybe figure out who she was.  Maybe that's what she though loner life would be, freedom to do as she liked. She had found, however, that it wasn't. A loner's life was governed by survival- what freedom she had was limited by the constant worrying and fretting about when her next meal was, or whether she would survive to the next month.

Could she find freedom in a pack? Or did that question negate itself?

Suddenly, Kesle found herself spilling her thoughts to this wolf.

"You see, I'm considering joining a pack, but... I... It's been so long. I'm not sure I want to still, and if I did, I'm worried that it would be different than I remembered, or worse, no different than I remembered. Maybe it's me that's different now. I just..." she trailed off, the words dying on her lips. What was she doing? A year on her own, and suddenly she's throwing her problems and thoughts onto a wolf she's only known for five minutes?

"I'm sorry to trouble you. I know it has nothing to do with you. I don't even know your name."


OOC: Angst... Cx
Muse: Not as good as I would like...

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Zira's smile was warm and thankful when the stranger finally spoke, telling her to stay. It made her take a step forward to let reaffirm her visually she wasn't gonna leave if she didn't want it. Her smile was something heavenly- it held all the light of the world and seemed like it could rid its darkness. It really did. She would hope one day, peace could be something these lands knew. But, with the new pack, Osani, she didn't know.

Zira's face softened when the wolf spoke of her dilemma, of joining a pack but fear holding her back. Zira nodded lightly, knowing just how terrifying change is, and its consequences. It was something she had experiences, and her ears were forward with anticipation. Already, the two strangers had so much in common. Zira had a sympathetic smile now, her eyes kind and grieving for the femme. She cut herself off and apologized, and Zira started to shake her head 'no.'

No, no. Do not be troubled- this is what I live for, honestly. You see, I understand. At least, I believe I do- Zira corrected herself. She didn't know this wolf, nor could she assume that their experience was as similar as it sounds. See, I had fears of pack life, too... When I was a child, I lost my entire pack to an illness and since then I felt nothing but fear of loss. I didn't think I can bear to even let there be a possibility of that happening again. Zira explained, her words the very being of wisdom. The very essence. It lived in her, she was its willing host.

There's no trick, or key to deciding on pack life again. You just gotta do it, really... Is it what you really want, or really need? The thing we don't understand today is our natural instinct for community and family has been corrupted, and it only lives in a select few of us. Zira paused a moment, and her eyebrows furrowed together, a thoughtful gesture. I'm Zira, by the way. Sorry for the testimony, Zira chuckled, a sound so soft and sure.

- - -

ooc; i love this girllll bah

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Kesle listened intently as the wolfess- Zira, she corrected herself- spoke. As she listened, she felt something stir inside her. The words seemed to thrum in her heart.

"Is this what you really want, or really need?"

Kesle recalled the times as a pup, when she had been with her family- hunting, playing, or feeling her siblings' pelts brush against her own as she drifted off to sleep- when a deep feeling came over her that she hadn't quite understood, being so young. It had been something of peace, of belonging. She had known, somehow, that this was where she was supposed to be. It was bound in her very soul.

But as her family had fallen apart at the seams, that feeling had slipped away. It has been replaced by frustration, heartache, and an itch to leave the broken world that had once been her home. But as Kesle listened to Zira, she realized that she had missed that feeling with an ache she only now felt.

It was like a weight had been lifted off the smoky she-wolf's back. She knew what she wanted again. Her previous worries of restrictions that came along with pack life were still there, but Kesle shoved them firmly to the back of her mind, almost giddy with the newound sensation of being sure in a descision. I'll deal with that as it comes.

Perhaps she had known all along what she wanted- maybe she had only needed to share her thoughts with someone else, to sort through her mind. Either way, she felt she owed this wolf with the eyes the colour of new leaves. Kesle raised her head slightly, meeting Zira's brilliant gaze with her own pale yellow-green one. She smiled a little, enjoying the feel of it.

"Nice to meet you, Zira. I'm Kesle. And I think I already owe you a 'thanks'."


OOC: Oh, the drama...
Sorry for not responding sooner, my muse was flop last night.
Muse: Alive and recovering.

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Zira smiled when Kesle introduced herself, and thanked her. Her smile was warm and contagious, and abundant with sweetness. She saw goodness in this she wolf, and also the same feeling of loss she once had known, but strength to go on strong in her. Zira wouldn't be so quick to judge, but she wandered if this wolf was just a younger image of herself. Zira also found herself pondering the struggles and joys this femme has known. Kesle, a pleasure as well. Zira spoke, her voice syrup spilling from her tongue.

Zira remembered again her family and the lengths she would go to now to not only protect her new family, but to live for them as well. As a loner, she had found it easy to find nothing to live for- granted, she would never had committed suicide or anything of the sort, but life was hard then. Now, the challenge was welcomed.

Kesle met Zira's eyes, and she smiled a little wider. I apologize for my life story. However, it is in my nature to assist anyone who might need the wisdom I can offer. Zira said, her smirk sympathetic but also proud- in a humble way, again. How she could pull it off, no one would ever know. She was a contradiction with breath, and it was an interesting miracle of nature. Just as she was. She didn't know very many wolves these days with the long standing morals and instincts as the original wolf; ones with the desire for family, community, fairness, equality. Most everyone these days were out for power- not wellness.

- - -

ooc; JEEEEEEZUS this sucked i am so sorry .-.

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Kesle felt herself returning Zira's warm smile. The feeling of smiling felt odd, and suddenly she realized it had been quite some time since she had felt the need to smile. There was little to smile about in the last weeks, with winter looming overhead and prey steadily dissapearing off down into holes and migrating to unreachable places to escape the harsher winter climates.

It seemed that once again the green-eyed she-wolf had helped her. Kesle suddenly felt the need to give something back. That was two favors that she owed Zira, and ske felt uncomfortable simply taking them and returning nothing.

Kesle dipped her head to Zira. "It's quite all right, I don't mind at all. You know...." she trailed off thoughtfully. "There are not many who would do such things for strangers. Your wisdom has been well gifted."

      




            WIP




OOC: You know, I totally forgot about this thread. ><
It's not too late, is it?