Monster [open]

[Deleted]

It was becoming exceedingly hard not to turn around and watch her struggle. He could certainly hear it. The muffled noises of frustration, the way she breathed. It was all too delightful. He liked the way he got under her skin, how his actions brought frustration boiling through her. But it wouldn't do to have her parading around in a frenzy. That's not the way he worked. He was a silent killer, so much so that even the victims couldn't tell when they were being broken. Like many things in his screwed up life, it was a delicate process. He sighed, stopping and turning to face her, a slightly annoyed look on his face. "Anima" He said flatly, his voice weighted with authority, "I will not have my company act and think in such a way that you are. You say you want to please me? Then do not behave in such a vulgar manner. What pride and honour is there in someone who succumbs to anger so quickly." his voice was sharp, holding harsh tones to overpower the ones that she held in her head. Taking a steadying breath himself, he spun around once more, leaving her to contemplate what he had said.

The minutes ticked by in tense silence, Zitao's mood spoiled. He supposed he should practice what he preached, and began to speak again, breaking the aura of quiet between them. "You do not know anything about what I do" he said, his voice holding the softness it had earlier, "You think it is just a game, and it may start out as such, but it is a long spiral down to madness. You would not be able to handle the negative recoil such things have on your mind. You are too.... warm." Oh god... was that... a compliment? He wasn't sure. He hoped not. He was never one for sappy pickup lines or wooing females, and so such words rarely ever crossed his lips. He was suddenly uncomfortable, a deep knot forming in his stomach. Stop it he said to himself, You're being ridiculous. Besides, it will be beneficial to you if she thinks you are softening; starting to care. It was only once he attached a dark idea to the thought did he feel better. Funny how that worked.

He waited once again before speaking, forming the words in his head first. He wanted something. Short, straight to the point, but it also had to catch her off guard. It was a hard mix to fill. He needed to chink off pieces of her shield. He pulled the question from his muddled thoughts, thankful that she couldn't see the evil grin forming on his face. "Anima...." he purred, voice unreadable,

"Do you... hate me?"

[Anima]

In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. The young wolf focused solely on her breathing as she tried hard to ignore the words coming from the wolf who called himself her master. How utterly wrong he was. His words absolutely disgusted her. She had just stayed calm through getting punished, going on a hunt for him, getting punished for doing something for him, and then a nightmare. Who the hell was he to say that she angered quickly or had anger problems at all? It was beyond obvious which one out of the two actually had anger issues and it certainly was not her.

After ignoring the first part of his conversation, it was hard to convince herself to listen to the second part. Why should she care at all about what he did or who he was when he didn't care about her at all? Simple. She didn't. She was like a robot mentally, doing what she was told to get by. Up until that point, she had tried to keep her emotions out of that mentality but she no longer gave a damn. If he wanted an emotionless bitch than that would be how she pretended to to act around him. No emotions at all, no talking,  no making her own moves. She really did not care if she became a robot around him, it would be so much less stresful for her and she had no reason to care until breeding season came about.

When he asked if she hated him, she couldn't help but roll her eyes. Did he really have to ask that question? Did he really not know the answer or at least have an idea? If he didn't, he was even more clueless than she had originally thought. "No," she responded with an absolutely emotionless voice. It wasn't a lie but it was also not the entire truth. However, robots didn't speak in long sentences and until he was done wanting her to be one, she would say no more than she had to.

[Deleted]

He frowned visibly this time, tilting his head at her unanswering form. Surely she understood herself better than that. He had expected more from her by now, but maybe that was just because he was in such control of his own emotions. Yes, he would sometimes get furious, but that was only in dire situations, and he always managed to calm down. It was a logical way of thinking. Anger clouds judgement, makes you do and say things you end up regretting later. Zitao had no regrets. That's why he could confirm that he was in control. Anima, however? He supposed she had some. The happenings of the fire, perhaps. And surely at least a little regretted ever meeting him in the first place, all thanks to the emotions clouding any sense of purpose. Making her weak. His mind was recalled to that day. If he were to go back now, would he have done the same thing? He considered it for a second, knowing that he would. It was too much fun to miss out on.

She stayed silent and blank, no replies coming out of her mouth. It was slightly irritating. He was trying to be reasonable, to show why he had denied her, but it slipped through her head like water. So be it. He would not keep trying to push. He would not break first. If she wanted an unloving master, than so be it. He wouldn't waste his breath explaining things she paid no mind to. He was above that.

He chuckled at her answer. It was short and blank, which he expected. "Yes you do" he sang, not caring if the words were true or not. He was done with her whole damsel in distress thing she had going on. He was done with her self pitying "I hate the world" persona as well. She was here to please him, and he reminded himself of that. A lion does not worry about the opinion of sheep. Her silent obedience was just fine with him. She would be the one suffering, if any. He looked at her briefly before turned back to the path, "Do not burn your bridges, little bird." he cautioned, "You don't have very many left."

The sun was high in the sky, pounding on his black coat. He had been pushing on through sheer will, determined to travel far and fast into the meadow. Finally, with a sigh, he stopped, resting in the tall grass. "We will rest here for now" he stated, looking at her with an apathetic look on his face. He considered saying more, but decided against it. Let the silence go on.  I will not break first.

[Anima]

The white wolf, no matter how angry or frustrated she became with her master, knew that the real reason she was that way was not because of him but because of the large amount of sleep she had missed out on. She was exhausted both mentally and physically and it really took a toll on her and how she thought about things as well as what she was capable of doing.  She knew her master had to have some idea of how tired she was, she knew he was not that blind, but she figured he would not let her rest. She figured that in order to break her quicker, he would not allow her to sleep, that he would continue to let sleep, or the lack there of, eat away at  her mind and body.

However, when he told her that they would stay and rest where they were, she relaxed almost instantly, her body hanging in exhaustion as she sunk down to the ground and onto her side, the strength to even stand abandoning her. Her eyes drooped closed and without a word, she was passed out cold, instantly lost in a deep, well needed and well deserved, sleep. Her mind was completely blank, too tired to think of anything to dream about. It was the first sleep in days that she was not forced to relive any part of the tragic incident. It was the first sleep where she was completely calm and relaxed, letting her body as well as her mind heal and recharge. As the hours ticked by, the sun moving across her back, she never once stirred, not even to change positions. If it was not for her deep breathing, one would think she was surely dead. She hoped she would never have to wake up, that she could sleep just like this forever.

[Deleted]

He watched the relief flood through her at his words. Zitao had noticed her weariness, the hardened path the had made in the clearing a clue to how long she had been up. However, that in itself had been reason to push on relentlessly. He wanted her to learn not to be weak; to be able to push when you had to and rest when you had to. The world never stopped spinning just for a single wolf's needs, and seeing the neutral effect talking had on her, he had decided that actions, although crueler, were more effective than reasoning. It was strange, holding back his thoughts. He had been so used to silence before, but after tasting the freedom that was conversation, it was an unusual feeling to go back to. He had considered pushing on until she couldn't take it and begged to stop, but he knew both that he would tire as well and that there was a risk that it would make her even more hateful. It was both frustrating and relieving that she held most of her thoughts back. She never whined at him for one thing or another, but he could never tell her breaking point; how much was too much. He had to figure that out by himself.

In all honesty, Zitao had only planned on resting for maybe half an hour. He was eager to move, even with so much heat trapped beneath black coat, but Anima just slept. And slept. And slept. He considered waking her up a couple times, irritated, but never managed to actually do it. She was dead sleeping, as he called it. He had done it many time before, and knew how reviving it could be. However, he only rarely fell into such a deep state of sleep, and only after many days of consciousness. He hadn't realized she had such a low tolerance to sleep deprivation. A sly smile plucked at the corner of his mouth. Yet another way I surpass you, little bird.

He grumbled, watching the sun tease across the sky, submitting too fast into afternoon. Zitao had barely thought of enough things to entertain himself with, silly things that changed the scenery ever so slightly. There was now a rock pile here that had been far across the meadow. Also, a gathering of sticks and branches, the wood and bark separated into two separate neat piles. The whole time he was busying himself, he mind constantly wondered why it was that he didn't just wake her up and get on with it. Perhaps he was waiting for her to do so on her own, but that seemed to not be happening. Finally giving in to impatience, he prodded her side with his foot, face pinched in annoyance. "Anima" he called, hoping to rouse her from her slumber. "Wake up." They had lost so much time here. Granted, it was time that would have just been spent wandering, but still something that he was determined to make up. Some how.

[Anima]

"But it's the first time I've slept in over five days," she muttered barely coherently as she heard her name being called miles away ay the surface of her concious. Even though she was able to speak a full sentence, she forgot what she had said the moment she finished her argument. She fell back into a deep sleep, not moving again. Somewhere in her mind, she knew she should really get up before things went in a different direction and he used pain to wake her up. However, her exhaustion was like weights tied to her ankles that kept making her sink back down into the dark depths of sleep every time she tried to climb to the surface of reality. Even though her conciousness kept trying to tell her what to do, her subconscious was not listening and her body had vastly different plans. She could physically feel her body gaining strength and relaxing as it healed and her mind became stable and submissive again, bringing her back to being herself.  The feeling it all brought over her was one of pure euphoria.

The sun beating down on her back sent relaxing chills down her back as she slowly started to return to actual reality. She squirmed a little, her body not wanting to move despite being fully rested. Her eyes blinked, once...twice...three times before they finally opened, whimpering silently at the brightness of the day as her blue eyes adjusted. Her mind was the last thing to reach the surface as she yawned. "Master," she nodded to him, her voice sounding submissive, herself again. Another minute went by and she jumped to her feet, shaking the dirt out of white fur and being reminded again of her neck and paw but she was in no mood to feel self pity. She felt well rested for the first time in what seemed like ages and she had better things to spend her energy on. "I'm ready to move when you are master," She told him with a sense of eagerness. She didn't want to stay in one place. She was ready to explore and go back to being the obedient pet, only even more so now that wasn't tired.

[Deleted]

He was surprised by her words, mumbled from the semi-conscious state she was in. He opened his mouth to reprimand her on talking back to him, but she had already fallen back asleep. He huffed angrily. "Anima." he hissed. "Anima!" It was no use. How was he supposed to work with this? He had worried when he first met her that she might slow him down, and here she was, the idea coming back to bite him. He spun around, storming in a circle around her. Perhaps he would punish her later, if he felt like it. But there was an innocence that everyone held during sleep. unfiltered thoughts, raw emotions and wants. Could he really punish her for such a natural thing?  I can if I bloody want to, he growled to himself, but even then he knew it was in vain. 

He went on an adventure. Yes, it was risky leaving her alone. She could wake up at any time, and there was the odd chance that something along and stole her, but he knew if I had to pull one more piece of bark off a stick he would truly go insane. So he went on an adventure, risks be damned. He left her unconcious form by the piles of sticks and rocks, venturing off the track he had planned for the two of them. Finding a river, he decided to follow it, knowing it was most likely one of the many that popped up, ran for a couple hundred meters, then escapes back into the earth. His feet splashed through the water, sending sparks of cold up his legs to match the fish scattering underfoot. He was utterly, blissfully alone, at the mercy of his thoughts. It was times like these that he wondered why he even wanted to keep her in the first place. He gave up a little bit of freedom the moment he declared her as his pet. Yes, it opened some doors, and 'master' was a title that suited him, but Anima could not give all he needed. She wouldn't ever be truly open around him, he knew that much. There would always be a side to her that remained unobserved. It couldn't be helped. Zitao had many sides like that as well, different interests and thoughts, but she couldn't pick those apart either. It was not her place. Once again, he was stuck keeping someone at arms length. A sigh blew past his lips as he reached dry ground, yellow eyes blank to the world around him. He was so zoned out he almost fell into the narrow crack that served as a passage way for water into the underground. He wondered what it would be like to become fluid, dripping through the crack as he and the water were one. If only. Yet another sigh huffed out of his ribs before he turned, returning to both Anima and the chains that held him.

He watched her wake up, eyes narrowed. His veins felt hot under his skin, not anger but something like it. He didn't reply to her master, although he noted how this time she said it, it wasn't laced in undertones of something darker. He just continued his silent stare. It was only at her second statement that he let a small scoff escape his mouth, pulling himself to his feet. "I'm so glad" he cooed, voice coated in sarcasm. He knew he was being childish and grumpy, but he didn't bother reining the feelings in. He had lost half a day. Perhaps not a lot of time, but it was the principle of the matter that stuck under his skin. He didn't say much more, knowing that his tone would likely be less than friendly, just a simple "Fine. Lets go." before continuing on their way.

The silence that surrounded them was thick and awkward. Zitao was waiting for her to say something, do anything that would cut through it. He had a lot to say; The walk he went on, how many rocks me pushed and rolled across the meadow (precisely fifty three), the amount of sticks he skinned (twenty one), but he couldn't. Anima was too far away, even when she was right next to him. She belonged to him, but she wasn't his. A difficult concept to wrap his mind around, and he spent a few minutes of the silence taking it apart in his mind. That is good, he reassured himself, she is nothing more than your pet. She is disposable. Somehow though, a small part of his brain screamed that that wasn't true. It was internal war, and he didn't know which side would come out on top.

[Anima]

The feeling the white wolf got when she finally woke up from her deep, finally finally relaxing, sleep was amazing. To say that she felt refreshed would be the understatement of a lifetime. She felt both mentally and emotionally stable for the first time since the incident. Her thoughts weren't clouded with tiredness so she was able to think and process things clearly. Even though she had wounds covering her body, the pain was all but entirely gone and she had a new found sense of physical strength. She hoped that this feeling would never wear off but she knew that even though she was able to have one good sleep without nightmares, she was certainly not done having them and that sooner or later, she would have one again. She wished that it would be later but she knew that with her luck, it would most definitely be sooner.

As she looked around and saw the multiple piles of random things, she began to wonder just how long she had actually been asleep for. She had originally thought she was only out for an hour or two, maybe three, but it was obvious she was out for much longer than that. The sun was no longer rising or even straight over head but was in the first stages of setting and there's no way her master would have gotten that bored in only a couple hours. She was afraid to ask how long she had really been out for as it was made clear that her master was not very happy with her at all for the amount of time she was asleep and she could only guess that the fact that she refused to wake up the first time he told her to, even though it was just a vague memory, did not help his anger any. She knew the best thing to do would be to keep quiet and move quickly to make up for lost time.

As she walked behind her master, tail and head tucked submissively and easily keeping up with him, she allowed her mind to stray off to all of her earlier thoughts. She knew then that it was foolish of her to try and go to such extreme measures so quickly but at the time, she was too tired to think about time. She would still make the snow storm happen and she would still make him hers but there was no way the snow would stick long enough to bury anything for a couple months still. She would have to really gain his trust which at the moment she had none of and she knew it would take a while to gain. She would have to play the perfect obedient pet, there was no other option. The next thing her mind drifted to was how to get him to control all of her, not just her mind. As she walked behind him, her eyes ran over his dark fur. The way the sun glistened off his pelt, how his muscles flexed with each step he took, the way he carried himself with an air of dominance and pride, the way his yellow eyes complemented his black fur. She was far from falling for him emotionally and she did not plan on ever doing so. However, physically was a different thing all together. She definitely would not mind him controlling all of her which was good because she needed the extra trust and power that would make him think he had over her. However, she knew she had several months to go before he would even consider doing anything so she needed to plan long term and not try to go into things so quickly. She would spend the time between then and when breeding time came around becoming the perfect pet and throwing in a little bit of flirting every now and again. By the time it was time, there would be no way he wouldn't want to control her.

After revisiting her earlier thoughts and making sense out of them, her mind returned to reality and the things going on around her, not wanting to miss anything. She was curious as to where they were heading, doubting they were just pointlessly wandering. "Where are we going master, anywhere in particular?" she asked him curiously breaking the tense silence that had surrounded them since she woke up. She tried to think of some places that were around them but came up with nothing. She had only recently reached the north and she was found by her master after only being in it a day or two. The only places she knew were the places he had gone with her and that was not a lot. Even though they moved a lot, she found that they were a lot like migrating birds, always returning to where they started.

[Deleted]

Her question, although welcome, caught him slightly off guard. He had expected her to say something, but certainly not that. "No" he mumbled, voice floating easily over the air. "Nowhere in particular. We are simply surveying the land. Exploring, if you you will." Ugh. It was harder than he had expected to hold in the thoughts bursting in his head. He wanted to talk, to explain his excitement even though every piece of land around them looked like the next. Childish he mused to himself. He shouldn't be this happy about roaming. Yet he had a wanderlust, and inexplicably so. He had assumed it was just because he liked to conquer, to feel like he owned every piece of dirt he walked on, but the real reason was far beyond even his grasp. It was buried deep in his mind, mixed with all the other mental instabilities, so inconspicuous that not even his own conscious he detected it. He was running. He had been since the moment the first drop of his siblings blood hit the ground, and even more so when his mother joined them. He was escaping the darkness of his past, erasing it with the many memories of different places he held so dear. Perhaps, had he knew about this real reason, he would have put a stop to it, some sort of self-psychiatry shit, but alas, he was left in the dark with everyone else.

His path had started to curve, a slow arch that would eventually make its way to be parallel to the original path. This was how he was planning on doing it, until he felt that he knew enough of the North that he could recite the lands like he was born there. Perhaps it might be boring to other company, but Anima was the only one with him, and even if she tired of the long marching days or the repetitive nature, she couldn't go anywhere. For the first time in forever, he could confidently say that he had someone that wouldn't leave him. Even if it was only because she couldn't.

[Anima]

The answer that Anima received from her master was not one that she had expected. He had always seemed so focused, determined, and goal oriented that she never expected him to enjoy just walking around. Exploring was something the white wolf had done both with her uncle and her siblings since she was just a pup. They had discovered a lot of neat and interesting things during their travels and she could probably name most if not all of the most interesting things and places that had been discovered. Exploring is what brought her to the northern part of the island and to the meadow where her master found her. The natural curiosity that was bred into the wolf often led to getting herself into trouble while exploring no matter how hard she tried to stay away from it. However, no matter how much she enjoyed it, it was not a hobby she thought was shared with her master. She smiled ever so slightly at the thought.

"Master...is there anything wrong? If there is, you can tell me if you want." Her tone was one of concern but she spoke quietly, afraid of how he would react to her being concerned. She figured he would take it as weakness or would laugh at the thought that she was actually worried about him. As much as she hated those thoughts, she couldn't sit by and not ask him if something was bothering him. She could tell something was off, that something was different, but she couldn't tell what it was. The fact that he refused to speak his mind made it difficult to tell when he was anything but mad. It annoyed her that he refused to open up, even a little to her. How could she really be his if she never knew anything about him? No matter how hard she tried, until he started to open up, their would always be a wall between them that would stop her from really being his.

[Deleted]

Is there anything wrong?
The words echoed in his mind. The mere idea of her asking such a question made him pause, uncertain how to feel about her concern. Part of him wanted to be warmed, part of him wanted to be irritated, although he wasn't sure why. She seemed almost scared of asking him, and he supposed she had reason to be. He knew he was never in any way talkative, or at least of himself. With good reason though. He knew the monsters that slept within him, the vices and chips on his mind ready to unravel everything he had worked so hard to keep inside. Melodramatic and healthy, perhaps, but it was the safest way. He knew the many ways he could, and had, destroyed, the begs and pleas that hadn't gotten through the muffle of the bloodlust and into his conscious mind. It was too much to risk for him, to expose these feelings, and too much to handle for everyone else. It was his burden alone, and he was determined to carry it by himself. It was the only way he knew how. 

You can tell me if you want. 
yes, he could tell her. Parted of him wanted to tell her. But he wouldn't. He wouldn't tell her about the screams in his head that woke him up at night, gnawing away at his sanity until all there was left of him was a shuddering, tearful mess on the ground. He wouldn't tell her about the constant darkness that he could feel in his mind, and how it threatened to destroy anyone who he let come close. Nor the way it already had, ripping his family from him, and making him the culprit. He wouldn't tell her because he couldn't. He had let those thoughts silently burn in his mind for years, building up pressure in their cage until any form of trying to fix them would bust a hole in the damn. He couldn't be weak. And thus, he couldn't tell her.

He was quiet for a few seconds, not looking back at her. What could he say? He was trapped between not wanting to tell her and not wanting to push her farther away. For once, his mind was blissfully blank, his voice coming out soft and distant, "Everything's wrong" he breathed, a sad smile on his face. He paused, not even sure if she heard his words. Or if he even wanted her to.

[Anima]

The white wolf, once trained to be a high and mighty, had never before been afraid to ask a questions. Questions, up until the point she was at then, had always been exactly that, a question. They never had any hidden parts to them and they were always innocent. Sure, there were nosy questions (which she had a lot of), disrespectful questions, learning questions, questions that stemmed from pure curiosity, especially that of a pups, and a lot more. But, they were questions that could be answered or ignored depending on if the one who was asked felt like answering them. Since she rarely ever, if ever, asked disrespectful questions so there was no reason for anyone to ever get mad at her for asking anything. They may have gotten a little annoyed but that would only because of how many questions she asked, not the questions in and of themselves. Because of all this, the feelings she got when she asked if he was alright were unknown and strange to her. It felt... off being afraid to ask such a simple and caring question. The way her mind coward as she waited for him to answer was a completely new feeling and one she certainly did not like. There were times when she was afraid to know an answer but she had never been afraid of what actions a question would bring on. The way she felt over something so simple really proved to her just how much control and power he already had over her.

The way her mind coward back when her master opened his mouth to reply made her wonder how she could stay so calm and collected on the outside, not that she was complaining. She was sure he could tell simply by her voice that she was afraid to ask her question. However, she did not need him to know just how afraid she was. That would only give him another leg up and she wanted to avoid that as much as she possibly could. She frowned at his reply, though her ears perked in both curiosity and concern. The fact that he actually held himself back from snapping at her made her want to continue to talk, to try and break some of the ice between them. However, for the exact same reason, she wanted to stay quiet and not push her luck. After all, she had learned more than once that when she was around her master, it was better to be safe than sorry. But, even though she was leaning towards staying quiet, her caring personality got the best of her and she continued to push. "What all is wrong master, if I may ask? You don't have to tell me everything, or anything at all if you don't want to, but it may actually help if you get some of it off of your chest." She tried to make her words sound like she wasn't ordering him to talk and she hoped he could pick up on that. She really didn't want this conversation to take a turn for the once because it felt like one of the first decent and civil conversations they had had. Not to mention, despite how mean he could be to her, it was not like her not to try and help when she could.

[Deleted]

"Will it?" he muttered to himself, snorting softly. He wasn't sure how to take her new found confidence, if it was even that. Anima was delicate, in the sense that once broken, she seemed to take a long time to put herself back together. It was a useful trait for him to use against her, but it also meant that any time he got angry  at her for whatever she did, she would likely not do it again. He supposed that was a perk, he hated repeating himself, but on the days that he was grumpy or ready to snap, it made thisgn a bit tricky on his end. Luckily today was not such a day.

He considered her words. They weren't pushy, more innocent, gentle prodding of the wall they had between them. There were risks to breaking that wall, Zitao knew them all too well. At the same time, however, he couldn't necessarily think of any immediate reason not to. His past did not have such a tight hold on him that it could be used against him. He sighed deeply. There was no one place to begin. "Yes, I suppose it might" he went silent again, trying to form his thoughts into words, "You know, little bird, there are things even I detest the presence of. Everyone has fears. You mentioned that yours was fire. But you see, I am much more complicated than that. My demons only bother me sometimes, but when they do, its a lot worse than how you feel towards fire. Almost as if it saves up the emotion in silence before letting it all out in a big bang." He nodded to himself. "Imagine how you would be feeling if you were the one who lit the fire. Now imagine doing it hundreds of times. That is what bothers me." The words felt foreign coming out of his mouth. He had never spoken about himself in such a way. He had mentally avoided the subject, perfectly content to let it rest in his past. The problem was that he never fully understood the way his mind worked.  It was a constant battle ground in his mind, the monster and whatever lightness there was still left in him battling for his consciousness. The monster always won, eventually. He needed something to hold it back, to keep his feet on the ground. Perhaps that is why he had chosen to keep Anima. The slight amount of emotional suffering she went through was constant enough to lull the darkness to sleep. There was no relapse either, as far as he could tell. It was the safest, easiest way. Perhaps at the cost of Animas freedom and mental stability, but that was a price he was willing to pay.

[Anima]

"I think it might, and really, do you have anything to lose? I mean from the way you said everything, it sounds like you only have stuff to gain and I wont judge you, I swear. I have already been told about one wolf....and it surely can not get any worse than what she told me." As Anima spoke of the black she wolf that had once stayed with her pack for a week, her thoughts drifted to the things she had told her. How she was forced to survive growing up, how she was forced to murder, how she killed her own father, the lust for blood and power that she had and that she fulfilled every chance she got. The white wolf shuddered at the thought. Their personalities had been as opposite as the fur that covered them. In her mind, there was absolutely nothing worse than the things she had done and continued to do with each passing day. When she was first told about everything, she refused to believe it, believing it was some story made up to scare her. However, after she saw the way she hunted and the way she would start eating the animal alive, no matter how hard she tried to believe it was all fake, she knew everything she had been told was the absolute truth.

When her master actually listened to her and opened up some, she couldn't help but smile slightly. She had expected him to shut down or to grow angry and lash out at her. The last thing she expected was for him to actually listen to her but she was happy that he did. As she listened, her ears pinned and she shook her head, trying to clear away the mental images. She knew she was not the cause of the fire that destroyed everything she held dear but the mere thought was enough to make her cringe. And when he mentioned doing it over and over again, how could she ever allow herself to do something like that? She took a deep breath in an attempt to steady herself and refocus. "What exactly do you mean? In a non metaphorical sense?" She asked tilting her head slightly. She wanted to know what was bothering him, not be bothered herself.

[Deleted]

Zitao listened with more curiosity than he should have had to her words. This other wolf sounded interesting. Was she really so terrible that Anima thought he was better? The thought was laughable. "No, little bird, there is no one worse than me, I can assure you that" He was surprised by the pride he had when he said the words. He likes to be the best, even if it was at being the worst. He had truly never met anyone who had such a darkness as he did. He couldn't fathom it. But the idea was alluring. Anima had said 'she'. If she was telling the truth, than it made it even more tempting. "but even the simple fact that you can compare someone to be is interesting. I would simply love to meet them" the words rolled off his tongue venomously. He would meet them, and if he saw fit, kill them in the way he saw best. He was never one for competition.

A slight frown appeared on his face at her words. If she had been someone else, he wouldn't have bothered to continue on the subject. But, since she was hit pet, he knew it couldn't hurt. "Anima, you do realize that the only reason I am even allowing you to continue is that I am confident in my ability to rip your throat out should you speak of this to anyone, right?" His mind whirred happily at the taste of the threat on his tongue. She was too curious for her own good. Perhaps, had he been in a fouler mood, he wold have rid her of such audacity, but he was in a daze like state from walking all day, and had no argument against it. It was the first normal conversation they had had. "Non-metaphorical?" he scoffed, "My, my, little bird. Whats the cause of such confidence that you feel the right to specifics?" He glanced back at her, head tilted, but sighed. "Everything you do in life has recoil, whether it be positive or negative. When you do the things that I do, the effects that it has can be less than fun. Most of the time, you can get away with coasting through reality with a dim fog, but once that clears, you are left to face what you have done." He frowned. Not exactly on-metaphorical. He had no reason to please Anima, but knew she would continue to pester him unless given a straight answer, "Did you know I had no siblings growing up? I didn't like having divided attention and... well, I am sure you can guess what happened next" His teeth pulled back in a wicked smile, the blurry memory tingling at the edges of his mind. "I also didn't have a mother. I took care of that as soon as I was independent enough to survive on my own. No loose ends, you know? And if you are wondering what kind of recoil that has, well, I still feel it to this day." He didn't go into detail on how it affected him, that would be too much. It was one thin to talk about past weaknesses, it was a completely different story to reveal present ones.